As an avid cook, this is almost embarrassing, but my kids love Hamburger Helper. I don’t love Hamburger Helper. It tastes like cardboard and the ingredients list on the side of the box is enough to make you run away screaming. Who knows what that stuff is. A lot of preservatives, for one thing. There’s just nothing fresh about it. And it’s not as if you’re going through a drive-through window and picking up dinner. You still have to cook it. What makes Hamburger Helper so popular is how quick you can get it on the table and the standardization of the directions in every variety along with the cutting open of packets and throwing it in the pot. It requires little thinking, which is often what you need at the end of a long day when you’re tired and everyone is hungry.
But! I (and you) can still give the kids what they want and put a quick home-cooked meal on the table at the same time. Make your own helper! You can even make it in advance so it’s all pre-measured and ready to toss in the pot on busy nights. Just like store-bought helper, your homemade helper comes with standardized directions and “packets” to throw in the pot. Very little thinking required–but in this case, it’s much more fresh and you can feel a whole lot better about feeding it to your family.
Using actual packages of Hamburger Helper and cookbook comparisons for the types of varieties offered along with my own cooking common sense and experience, I’ve broken down some of the most popular Hamburger Helper varieties. I’m showcasing Chili Cheese here–see below for the demystification of a number of other popular flavors.
Hamburger Helper Basics: When creating your own helpers, keep in mind that most packages of Hamburger Helper include about 1 1/2 cups of pasta plus a packet of sauce seasonings, sometimes dried tomatoes, and sometimes a packet of dried cheese, depending on the variety. If there’s anything more disgusting than dried cheese, I don’t know what it is. Some varieties use rice or dried sliced potatoes instead of pasta. Whatever you’re using for the starch base in the dish–1 1/2 cups is a good rule of thumb when making homemade helpers (except for rice, which I think works better using only 1 cup). After browning and draining the ground beef (one pound), in the same skillet you add water and milk (usually about 3 cups total), seasonings, and simmer (usually about 12-20 minutes). Add cheese near the end for some varieties.
What you need to have onhand to create homemade helpers: Ground beef, various herbs and seasonings and other basic pantry items (such as sugar, salt, and corn starch), pasta, rice, potatoes, canned tomatoes, and cheese. (You can buy large bags of pre-shredded cheeses to shortcut this step, or buy blocks of cheese and pre-shred it yourself.) Some varieties also call for Fritos or nacho chips, and most call for milk because it makes a creamier sauce. (Out of fresh milk sometimes? Keep dry milk in your pantry.) I always keep a large box of dry milk in my pantry so that I’m never out of milk.